God has also been giving me greater courage in Him in these last few months. That is what being continually in the Word does to a person--it grows us in sanctification and makes us more like Christ. We are filled with the Spirit, steered by the Spirit, when we are in God's Word. It is true!
I found myself in a kind of funk, a depression, in the middle of last year, as you may have observed from some of my posts. The worst part was that God was not using me as He had before. I guess know I was ignoring His leadings or just saying no to Him out of fear. But by immersing myself in God's promises and truths, God has brought me out of that pit. Since December, I have been offered a job writing for an emerging family ministry and I have had multiple opportunities to share Christ with my coworkers. I had been letting fear control me instead of the Lord, and because of that I gave up many opportunities to share my faith. I also had this strange idea that I couldn't share my faith with my coworkers because I waited too long and it wouldn't make sense to all of the sudden start talking about God more. I can tell you now that is a huge lie. Also, I find that most people are open to talking about spiritual matters. Most people don't agree with the Gospel though, so talking about Christianity is confrontational.
I am not a confrontational person.
I used to shake when I would talk about controversial topics with people I knew disagreed with me, but as I plow forward more and more with my love for Christ urging me on, my shakes are starting to disappear.
I still deal with my mind going blank, though. Do you deal with this? Today a coworker asked me what I was reading. I was reading "The 'Family' Quarrel" by Joe Dallas, which I found from Christian Research Institute. I knew she was a feminist who loves confrontation, a nice lady, but with an opposite worldview from mine. My mind froze and I had to struggle to explain the Biblical concept of the family, which I have been intently studying. I knew she wouldn't understand since she didn't understand the gospel, but I didn't share the gospel with her. Why didn't I share the gospel with her?! I felt so frustrated and guilty.
Does this happen to you? Can you relate? How have you matured in this area?
In conclusion, I find I am growing in Christ, but I am not perfect yet. This is a major theme of my life on earth.
