I've been lazy lately. Do you have those days, those months? For me it's been months, months of piled up dishes, piled up laundry, piled up prayers that haven't been prayed, piled up words of encouragment and God's grace that haven't been shared, blogposts that haven't been written, steps of obedience that have't been taken. I reached this peak of emotional crisis, questioning my purpose, my motives, my fears. I took time to relax and it became a habit. Actually, I didn't take time to relax if I'm honest. The truth is I didn't know what to do, so I just stopped. The truth is I've been battling anxiety, this general anxiety, and I just stopped.
Fear is paralyzing. I froze and struggled to break through the icy fear that encased me and walk through the spinning world that didn't wait form me.
Yet, God knows what I am made of, dust that so easily drifts with the wind of the world's shifting currents, but He never shifts to turn His back to me.
I love the encouragement of this line from A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23:
The disappointments, the frustrations, the discouragements, the dilemmas, the dark, difficult days, though they be shadowed valleys, need not be disasters. They can be road to higher ground in our walk with God.
The dark days break our pride and allow us to dwell in intimacy with our Saviour. When these dark day hit, I stopped, but I am thankful that our Good Shepherd drives us along through the valleys. I am beginning to hear His voice once again. "Walk this way," he whispers, and He gives me the strength to take each step. Christ, my Shepherd, enables me to keep walking ahead toward the next mountain. He strengthens me through his Word, godly friends, scripture, sermons, radio shows, books, a stranger's smile.
I must keep taking steps forward, trusting that God is concerned with my every step. My Maker accompanies me; He understands, and He alone lovingly carves out my paths. This is the truth. My head will tell me lies, but God doesn't lie. My head says that I need man's approval, that I am worthless, that I should give up. This is a lie. I can step forward with joy and confidence in what God has ahead. This is the truth.
